If Mary and Martha lived today, Martha would be one of those women on a mission to have the “best Christmas ever”.  I imagine she would pour over the holiday issues of Martha Stewart Living, Woman’s Day, Good Housekeeping, and Southern Living in search of another delicious recipe or gorgeous decorating idea or the perfect last minute gift idea.  Her shopping will be complete long before Thanksgiving.  By December 1^st, her home will be decked out with multiple Christmas trees that coordinate with their surroundings and her Christmas cards (possibly handmade ones) will be in the mail.  A beautiful nativity set will occupy a place of honor on her fireplace mantle.  Multiple entertaining events will be scheduled and a project plan will be in place so that each event will be executed to perfection. 

Contrast Martha’s sister, Mary.  Mary will be studying a special Advent devotional book, beginning each day with prayer time.  She will play Mary, mother of Jesus, in the church Christmas pageant on Christmas Eve.  Her home is a little messy, but that is not a big deal to Mary.  The Christmas tree is decorated with a variety of ornaments her children have made over the years, each one holding a special memory of a past Christmas. 

I guess it does not come as a big surprise to anyone who knows me well that I am a dyed-in-the-wool “Martha”.  And I have shared on many occasions that I am working on being more like Martha’s sister, Mary.   But here is my challenge.   Does it have to be an either/or situation?  Can’t Mary and Martha coexist?  I certainly hope so because as much as I want to develop and nurture my “Mary”, I love my “Martha” and the pursuit of the “best Christmas ever”.  For me, the ultimate expression of “personal effectiveness” would be to manage the tasks like Martha while honoring the meaning of the season like Mary.  Is that possible?  Sure!  The very best of Martha is what opens up the time and energy to embrace Mary.  Go for it!  I am!

Take care, and as always, I would love your hear your thoughts and comments.

I have worked hard over the last few years to change some of the habits that caused me to be less than the person I wanted to be.  But every once in a while I hit a bump in the road of life that throws me off my program.  In those challenging times, it is all too easy to say, "Forget it" and slide back into bad habits - habits that limit our effectiveness and make us feel bad about ourselves. 

I recently had one of those "bumpy" times, but something really encouraging happened.  Yes, I still slipped into some of those bad habits, but it was different this time because I took the time to take an honest look at what had caused me to slip.  By being self-aware, I was able to make my way over the bumps, and get back on track, feeling powerful and proud!!!

Stay tuned, and as always, I welcome your thoughts and ideas.

Karen

I have been off my program for the last couple of weeks.  My dad has had a major stroke and been moved to a nursing home.  It is one of the foundation-rocking events in your life that, no matter how old you are, or how inevitable it is, still rocks your world. 

It is during times like these that it is all too easy to slip back into old behaviors and habits.  And all too often, we beat ourselves up and fill our heads with all kinds of negative talk about how worthless we are because we didn't stick with the program.  Well, so what?  So you had a little slip?  Tomorrow is a new day - and every day you have an opportunity to start fresh! 

That's what we did today.  I finally got things cleaned up after letting stuff slide for the last two weeks.  And, boy, does it feel good to back on track! 

So what did I learn from these last two weeks?  My effectiveness is not measured by being perfect.  None of us is perfect and if we think we have to be, we are setting ourselves up for a lot of angst and pain.  No, my effectiveness is measured by how long it takes me to recover from a lapse in effectiveness.  Two weeks.  Hmmm - there is room for improvement here!!

Take care, and as always, I welcome your comments and ideas.

Karen

Several years ago we pulled into a parking lot and saw a beautiful creamy yellow Rolls Royce convertible!  Our curiosity about the car drew us over to take a peak when, to our surprise, a voice bellowed out from the car.  "Step away from the car", it instructed.  It was amusing and effective - we laughed and stepped back from the car, continuing to admire it from a distance!

Wouldn't it be great if we had a commanding voice inside us that instructed us to "step away" when we started to do something we know we shouldn't?  "Step away from the cookie jar!"  Or how about "Put the shoes back on the rack!"  The good news is that we all have the voice inside us.  So next time you think you are going to succumb to temptation, just summon up your most commanding voice and tell yourself to "Step Away!"

Stay tuned, and as always, I welcome your ideas and comments.

Karen

My Daddy is dying.  Since we got the news that he is beginning to shut down, I have spent a lot of time this week thinking about the gifts that I got from him - my musical talents, the ability to tackle any project with a "Can Do" attitude, never accepting that there were limits to what I was capable of doing. 

I also inherited some of my more challenging traits from him - my appetite, my "Missouri Mule" subbornness, and a little bit of temper.  Those traits - those less-than-desirable habits of mine - are part of my legacy from my Daddy. 

It is all too easy to say we can't change a habit because it dates back to our childhood, or to say "well that's the way my family does things".  But believe me when I tell you this.  Just because you grew up with certain habits does not mean those habits cannot be changed.  With a clear idea of what you need to change, a plan for how to make the changes, and a system for holding yourself accountable for following through, you can change your habits - the habits that will become the legacy you leave for your own children.  That is motivation enough for me!!  How 'bout you?

Stay tuned, and as always, I welcome your ideas and comments.

Karen